AskMeFi: So this guy I have a thing for, but who lives on the other side of the country, is coming to visit and will stay with me for one night.
Talk to him. Find out how is is, what he's been doing. And then admit you've been thinking about him (do not mention sex). Smile, and change the subject. This is the hook.
Crack the wine or serve the food. Talk about whatever (plan ahead if you're not good at small talk). Get him to talk about himself and what he's been up to. This will not only allow you to figure out if he's still available (just in case) but often the shape of his desires.
Clean up. Let him help you with the dishes (he may be slobbish and not offer, but he's reached this age, so presumably he has some manners. If not, suggest he gives you a hand (and thus avoid churlishness)). Rinse and flatter gently and naturally.
Now comes the least important part. Many people wrongfully consider this the make or break section, but truth be told, if he's in the kitchen with you, wiping dishes, or even rinsing them for the dishwasher, you've totally won. Now is not the time to say "you know, I've always fancied you", or even, "My bed is so much more comfy than the couch". Now is the time to say "I'd forgotten how good you make me feel." But that is not the sinker. The sinker is in how you go for the kiss afterwards. You absolutely cannot go for the Lunge! That is an abomination! You must gently move toward him, allowing him every opportunity to escape. Because otherwise he will feel forced. Do Not Say "I want to kiss you". Do Not Say "Roger me insensible". Go for the kiss and nothing but, with every fibre and every intention of carrying it through. That is the sinker and you've just caught yourself a man. Gut and fillet as you will. posted by Sparx at 3:47 AM PST on August 10