specific things I in theory want to do (but not actually? right now ) ---there are also all the general ones like read galleys, read all manner of things online ... the situation is that I kept going back to sleep 10ish 2ish and then it was 5:30pm ish - and then I watched two nip tuck episodes bcs I rented it and so .. and now do I try to wake up more, interest myself in sth - have something to eat and even maybe coffee? -- or just go back to sleep soon and do the wake up interest myself in the morning .. coffee and maybe espressoeggs w rdh at medici...

specifically (meaning, yesterday I wanted to -? or that I would want to again if I drank coffee):

read The Childrens Hospital

library thing read rvws, explore how the site has changed

try out blogger beta under a new log-in, see if dlww template can be used (not, right, if can no longer cut & paste directly into template html)

make notes on mdlww or on prufrockdancer - of texts - H ethics impossible opened up an abyss; TSE dancertogod alrdy on prufrock; TVZ you don't think life is sad? ; Natalia Ginzburg education is a relationship we establish w our children: & Winnicott saying the same in talk about morals & education...

nip tuck seems sad now after two episodes. sad for me to watch. dark.
as does Kidnapped wh is on the list of what I theoretically want to do:watch new Kidnapped episode #6 online and read twop forum about it.

twop forum and elsewhere like tvsquad recaps re nip tuck
but maybe I will be pleased more reading about lighter brighter shows of yesterday: Greys, MenInTrees, and House wh however is not very much lighter but new to me so light. I dislike Greys and MenInTrees as much or more than like them..

I do really like nip tuck. really very much? the characters say what I want to hear ~ I mean, they address my questions and the situations I want them to ~ so in a way it is exceptionally (among tv and book and movie dramas) believable to me. is that right?
maybe these episodes just felt that way bcs I got what I wanted wh was to see how Sean-Kimber plays out and how Christian-Natasha.
seems realistic. (to me. it may be very un realistic actually). Sean says just what I think, that Kimber has been so sweet to him. but life goes on and she is also ~ fruity or whatever. and natasha makes christian cry he is so moved it's a real beautiful love but life goes on and she is a hassle and irritating. life going on so much awful messy behavior and things gone awful - half the car stolen, faces cut, extreme relationships (Ava and 'son' Adrian) - and the world the story does not stop, it incorporates it and keeps going. maybe this is actually reassuring to me? plastic surgery at the center : you can change it, you can fix it, you can recover your face your body whatever the trauma. extreme solutions are possible, extreme destructions are not the end.
and christian troy is he always honest? I started watching with that qstn and so far yes he is so so honest. that's something on the list - make notes while watching of the things he says that to me are so satisfying honest. him to natasha both that he is spooked by her eyes and wants to bill her for all the spilled drinks and stolen car parts; also that she is too good for him, he means that, and he means it that the effect is mundane - that he is tired of it. christian really is very generous and caring - this is not at odds with being selfish about not dealing kindly with things he dislikes - but he was totally taking care of merill bobolit sponsoring him taking him to meetings and calling repeatedly when he cldnt make it. seems consistent w character, really the writing seems to me very consistent.
and christian is nice about the girl merrill likes, he hangs back when she comes up. and he seems sort of innocently flattered when she turns to him. there's this innocence, transparency about him I really like watching.
when sean assumes that christian planned to have sex w kimber so sean cld walk in on them and thereby get out of the relationship.. honesty was all over christian's face as he took that in and even in his then composed answer that "I did think that was what you wanted." he always actually tells the whole story, eg why mrs wentworth is getting free surgery, or that he is going to go out with kimber after all at the end of the episode. innocent? transparent? honest? boyish. even a little reminding me of rg, the open face, the cards really never held close. he may totally withhold - not tell you the cards - but he won't (be able to?) actually show a different face. this may not be right, just trying to think out what it is. it's an aspect, or kind, of personality I really like.
sean seems to me more complicated more confused more without real morals. I do like seeing him act like a hard ass like with matt and adrian and ava at the meeting with the principal. since my first sense of him, this season, he seems anxious and pussyfootin around always. I like him better seeing some (at least attempted) toughness and confidence.
so christian gets tied up with merrill, trying to help him
and sean is the one more entangled,affected by escobar
why's that? christian wants to help the weak person, sean is overwhelmed and inspired by a real badass, a criminal.
~christian wants a family (and so, acts like family to someone else who needs it. thorpish~). sean wants to be stronger.

the episodes I just saw, to make note: Oona Wentworth, and Trudy Nye. the latter had little info about it at tv.com so I speculated that it might be where sean-kimber and natasha-christian stories go on, since nothing in the other episode info about that. and yes, it was. and Oona Wentworth is the principal and that episode was much about Matt and Ava and Adrian. wh I had seen no backstory on, so, int.
the actor playing Adrian is familiar -? ah imdb Seth Gabel: "'The Closer' 1 episode -The Big Picture (2005).... Nikolai Kosolof

this is almost the end of the second season, two more episodes.

gilmoregirls, bostonlegal were fun to watch with my mom. house cld be watched with my parents, kidnapped too.
friday night lights, brothers&sisters - good with mom.
it's a nice way to spend time with my parents.
but I shld remember not to watch nip tuck with them. why? not exacty bcs of the racy sex scenes but just all the what gets called disfxn. my mom wld dislike it probably say things that sound flippant and offensive to me.

and was thinking yesterday about comedies: ArrestedDevelopmt, TheOffice, Scrubs. very funny. but not much draw to me to watch except socially with someone who will delight in them. it's not fun to delight in them alone? the settings and the ~irony ~surrealism in the characters relations to those settings are ~ depressing? to me. too much like the aspect of life that I dislike, even if modelling a way of coping (humor, wryness) that works for me. ..
for alone watching, I like character dramas I guess. I want to watch personalities that are interesting or appealling to me.
Weeds works for that. I like Nancy. I like Lorelai. I like Christian Troy. I like Gregory House, probably. I like Alan Shore. I like Jeremy Sisto as Lucien Knapp, very much. so might like to own nip/tuck season 2 (maybe season 1 also, maybe~ current season), might like to own FridayNightLights which is just overall the music the camerawork pretty and has some depth. I like the coach and his wife, matt saracen and jason street, but not so distinctly. it's more an overall good artwork - film. (really I don't covet ownership of these, I don't actually covet having them, it's just a way of thinking about what I like, what could be pleasant to do at some point in the future, possibly.)
and Kidnapped, I do hope they put out the dvd of Kidnapped, I like v much the idea of watching that straight through in company.
also alone like to watch the somewhat dumb shows like Greys while doing other things, that can be pleasant. ah Greys is a good contrast to what I like in Nip Tuck - above - how characters say things about what I want to hear about and in a way I believe. in Greys they're on some other social planet, they say things that seem all untrue! to me. so superficial or flippant or something as to be like lies. about their inner life. very depressing to me in actual life, I know, people do talk like this. it really fxns as reflection. I hope not all, no, not all. it feels to me like a repudiation of depth.
epitomized by sexinthecity, even more than greys I guess. at lst on greys I kinda like some of the characters a little. well oh on sexinthecity I do like samantha, more than a little. but not enough to make watching the rest of the people on the show un-depressing.

might like to own (that is to say, watch again from time to time): Weeds, Nip/Tuck. 8/10/07 done and done.
FridayNightLights, Kidnapped.

after this year will I watch this much tv again or will this have been my year or at least fall of television, that's what I guess.
cultural conversation, though, I do love talking and reading about what lots of people think of one story they have all been told.

so I am somewhat awake now, brown rice tea was good, it's 9:41pm, maybe I will eat sth.

8/10/07 all this reads to me as true, still. not false notes.