Calasso p45 Marriage of Cadmus & Harmony:

Dionysus is not a useful god who helps weave or knot things together, but a god who loosens and unties. The weavers are his enemies. Yet there comes a moment when the weavers will abandon their looms to dash off after him into the mountains.
Dionysus is the river we hear flowing by in the distance, an incessant booming from far away; then one day it rises and floods everything, as if *the normal above-water state of things, the sober delimitation of our existence*, were but a brief parenthesis overwhelmed in an instant.

the above water state of things.
all of this, the main, the politics and formulated opinions, is up here. it's all up here - hand gesture -

am I saying, it doesn't matter?
doesn't matter to me, after all. after all, at the end, in the flood. at the end it will not be with me. it will be as nothing. there will be animals, children, gestures, a song and a dance, an open face, emotion, movement and still. attachment. below the water is attachment, separation, loss. absence, nothing, everything, the flood.

I couldn't see you. -"if you could not see me, does it mean I was not there."

here: there is no there there. no parent; no persons of interest. no shadow falling across the subject. 'it was all air and no air. a space with some people in it.'
(above water, sober delimited, ok: give me a role to play, a role to *enjoy*: enjoyment, desire, that is something. some carry-over to the after.) no role, no play, no one, no there.

Ted Hughes: every ______ (expression ~ experience ~ encounter) of the true self is ____ and releases joy. ~ is healing. is healing and releases joy.

mc: what is it for? 'what you do for the least of these my brothers' - teaching, helping. the books for college. the writings collected, 'basic humanity publication.' so that? is it for the sake of more attachment, more feeling, fullness of life..so that this person can live a fuller life? what is the world you want? where, in what, is the worth?
(is the answer, "well if you have to ask...") I cannot see a worth that is not a you. subjectivity, depth, complication, feeling. no sake but in you. At The Same Time: all of you a they to me, I hardly like them at all. 'so many, I had not thought death had undone so many.'
where? -not here- is my 'species feeling'..

weavers, when will you abandon your looms and we will run off into the mountains